Different Strokes

It's amazing how movie reviewers can applaud male action movies for their jolly ton of testosterone, but find a like amount of the female hormone off-putting.

"With all the tinkling pianos and shots of gentle waves hitting beaches, you expect to see a feminine-hygiene product logo pop up in the estrogen-filled "Evening,'' says James Ward of the Visalia (Calif.) Times Delta. "You can almost see the estrogen flow off the screen in a cast that includes Clare Danes, Glenn Close, Toni Collette and two mother-daughter teams (Vanessa Redgrave and Natasha Richardson and Meryl Streep and Mamie Gummer).''

Well, unless any of the above performers are transgenders, it is likely that estrogen and not testosterone would be the operative hormone.

But if the male hormone sells movies, to both genders, what is it about the female one that apparently is dooming "Evening'' to the box office dumper?

One thing is certain: anybody who wants an inkling of how endless boy and guy movies get made and why they suceed need only consider the attitude of this grown-up, paid reviewer toward a movie from the opposite end.

Smith Fugit

Kevin Smith has a nifty "cameo'' in "Live Free or Die Hard,'' playing a computer genius named Warlock.

The inside jokes fly, among them, Warlock having a soft spot for daughters.

Smith's own daughter, Harley, just turned 8 on June 26; Kevin turns 37 in July.

Warlock is a fast-talking geek who knows all the nuances of computer technology, which is apt since Smith has been a pioneer in the blogosphere and interactive Websites, with his http://www.viewaskew.com/ arriving years ahead of almost everybody else (around 1994).

And vanity does not seem to be Smith's name: he now has a large bald spot at the back of his head, and he makes no attempt to conceal it in "Live Free or Die Hard.''

Gotta love it.

Who Sez?

I just love the latest American Film Institute's list of the top 100 movies of all time.

Not.

"Rocky'' shows up at No. 57 but "Roman Holiday'' didn't make the cut.

"Historical significance'' is a criterion for the list, but the movie that showed the murder of a major political leader one year before the JFK assassination, "The Manchurian Candidate,'' is not included.

There are no movies with Greta Garbo, Rosalind Russell, Irene Dunne, Audrey Hepburn, Barbra Streisand or Joan Crawford; only one each with Claudette Colbert, Bette Davis and Barbara Stanwyck, and by my count, about 65 percent of the movies are "guy'' flicks.

I tried to find out who the voters are: "1,500 artists, critics, historians,'' says the AFI press release, but nobody from the AFI called me back with a name, there are none on their Website (http://www.afi.com/) and nobody I know knows a voter.

If a favorite movie or performer isn't on this new AFI list, let me know!

Sickening

Speaking of "Sicko,'' as in the previous post, how's this for sickening?

"Pride,'' a truly fine movie, based on the actual story of a Philadelphia high school swim coach, grossed a pathetic $7 million at the box office.

Couldn't be a problem with the cast, full of stellar talent like Terrence Howard as the coach, plus Bernie Mac, Tom Arnold and good supporting players as the high school students.

Plus, it's an inspiring story: the coach broke down segregation barriers in the 1970s to get his black swimmers into citywide swim meets and they became champions.

"Pride'' arrives on the home viewing market June 26; do yourself a favor and watch it.
It's light years ahead of the bottom feeder movies made for (and exploiting) young viewers.

Sicko

Michael Moore exhorted a group of California nurses yesterday to get rid of private health companies now. "They must go! They must go! They must go!'' Moore chanted with the nurses.


Moore is stumping for his new movie about the woes of the American privatized healthcare system, "Sicko.'' It arrives at area theaters June 29.


My guess is that this is another Moore documentary that will (a) get "special interests'' people angry; (b) get many other people energized, and (c) stimulate public and political discourse on the state of healthcare in this country.

Moore's other documentaries, "Roger & Me,'' "Bowling for Columbine,'' and "Fahrenheit 9/11'' similarly inspired debate and heightened awareness of systems in need of overhaul (gun control, corporate down-sizing, congressional war resolutions).

Even if you disagree with Moore, you can't deny he has the right to air important issues. For that, we should be glad somebody has the intelligence and the money to pursue his agenda.

Hate mail

Well, let's not say hate, let's just say angry.

The mail about my review of "Knocked Up,'' was not good: most respondents either thought I had missed the movie's point entirely or that I was wrong in saying it was made for a niche market of 30s and under, or that I was hopelessly out of touch.

Another dissatisfied emailer said she had glanced at my review of "Bug,'' which emphatically stated that the movie was profane, violent and brutal, but, seeing that I gave the movie three stars, went to see it.

She hated it and got her money back.

Best to read the whole review.

As to my strong-minded pan of "Knocked Up,'' think about it: an audience member would loathe having someone tell them they had to love a movie, so why should a reviewer be under those strictures?

And if the angry writers remember, my review did say: "For some, it will be a hoot, for others a horror.''

Pace en terra.

Bernie Schwartz

Robert Osborne didn't ask Tony Curtis the one burning question I would have. TCM re-ran a superb 1999 TCM interview with Curtis over the weekend:
The question: "Did you really say that kissing Marilyn Monroe was like kissing Hitler?''
Since Curtis is Jewish and since he actually said he changed his named from Schwartz because it's German and he hated what the Germans were doing "to my people in Europe,'' the insult to Monroe is brutally meaningful.
Curtis did say he had compassion for Monroe's problems and he predicted "Some Like It Hot'' would be her last film because she was so fragile. (She made one more released film, actually: "The Misfits'').
Curtis made a chatty, revealing interviewee, as hard on himself (admitting he took cocaine, heroin and drank to excess in the 1970s and 1980s) as he was on his ex-wife Janet Leigh, co-star Kirk Douglas and producer-director Stanley Kramer.
If it's run again, grab it.